Ways to Cope With Infertility

(Originally Posted on Jun 11, 2015)

When you and your spouse have been trying to get pregnant for over a year, but you have not had any positive results to date, it can be a very trying time for you mentally and physically, as well as those who surround you. A baby shower can be agony to attend, and any mention of someone getting pregnant who wasn’t even trying can make you want to crawl into bed for days. While this can be a troublesome time in your life, it doesn’t have to be unbearable. Here are a few ways to cope with infertility. 

Don’t play the blame game

Infertility is not your fault, or your partner’s fault. The only thing you are doing when you start blaming yourself and others for the situation is adding more stress. And stress is something you want to avoid. The goal is to move forward in your endeavor and not let anything that happened in the past be at fault.

Looking towards the future will give you more answers than continually looking at what you could have, should have, and would have done differently. This will only trigger negative thoughts, and you need to start focusing on the positive in your life.

Find a creative outlet

You want to find something that has nothing to do with having a baby to take up some of your time. A creative outlet is a great way to get your emotions across without having to face them in the most realistic manner. Take up painting, or write in a journal every night whether it’s about how you feel, or if it is just to write fictional stories that have nothing to do with infertility.

Be honest with yourself

While you want to be optimistic about your situation, you also want to be realistic. It’s okay to cry and be upset, these emotions are normal when going through something as serious as infertility. Once you are honest with yourself and accept the situation, you will find that you are better able to communicate with your partner and doctor about it.

Know that no two people cope the same

While you may feel you aren’t getting any support from your spouse or family at this time, know that they are coping too. You may just not notice it because your own emotions are at battle with themselves. The more you open up to family and friends about how you feel, the more you will see that they are there for you, just in there own way.

Have open dialogue with your doctor

Be sure you are communicating with your doctor about how you are feeling both mentally and physically. Let them know how much you are willing to spend on treatment, how long you want to try for, and what your fears are. They understand that this is a difficult time in your life, and will want to know how you feel with each step that you move forward in.

If you are experiencing difficulties with infertility and are in the Palm Beach area, don’t hesitate to make an appointment. Call us today at 561-434-0111.

Dr. Gloria Hakkarainen

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